I have a couple of friends who are about to become fathers soon (you know who you are), and I was going to write something to them personally about advice for new fathers, but I decided to publish it here instead for ALL new fathers to see. Here it is...
There are a couple things you need to know about being a new father...
1) You're going to have to take care of your wife. She's going to be busy with the baby and will need someone to tend to her needs (food, water, maybe a foot rub). Don't be jealous of her relationship with the baby, because, yes, she is going to like Mama more in the beginning because Mama is the one with the breasts, but don't worry... it will all even itself out around Year Two or so. See, when babies are born, they come out about 9 months earlier in their stage of development than any other mammal (look up Ashley Montagu's research on this. He's really smart). The reason they do this? So their head is still small enough to fit through your wife's vagina. (If they waited another 9 months, their heads would be way too big to fit. Trust me on this.) So, yeah, babies really, really need their Mamas, especially in the beginning.
2) But don't let this mean that you don't take care of the baby at all. Your wife will also need help with this. Therefore, another important thing you need to learn is how to wear your baby in a wrap. Believe me, the baby, and your wife, are going to love you for this (and there really is nothing more sexy than a man in a sling). Don't rush into it or anything (baby and mom are usually pretty good tucked into bed together the first couple weeks)... but after that, get yourself one of those nice Moby wraps and learn how to use it. Please.
3) Speaking of having Mama and Baby tucked into bed together the first couple of weeks... make sure that she does this. Number one, it helps with bonding. Number two, it helps with getting Mama's organs back where they belong after the birth. And, Number three, it helps protect her pelvic floor. If you ever want to have sex with your wife again in the near future, you're going to want to make sure that she protects her pelvic floor. So, none of this walking around and letting her uterus drop down and put pressure on her pelvic floor. No, no, no. (This is one of the reasons she'll need your help with doing things around the house, by the way. So, be sure to volunteer to help so she doesn't feel like a pain for asking, because sometimes it's really hard to ask for help with something you're used to doing yourself). A good rule of thumb for incorporating more activity into each day is: Five Days In the Bed, Five Days On the Bed, and Five Days Around the Bed. If she tries to do too much too soon, just shout at her, "Protect your pelvic floor! Protect your pelvic floor!"
4) You need to be the one who checks in on your wife every single day to make sure that she is doing okay. Post-partum depression affects too many mothers, and it's not fun (especially if she gets to the point where she wants to throw your baby out the window, am I right?). So, YOU need to be the one to look her in the eye (EVERY SINGLE DAY) to make sure she is doing okay. Make sure there is some spark in her eyes. Make sure she is okay. This is up to you more than anybody.
5) Don't circumcise your baby. Sure, you have a circumcised penis. Big deal. You're not going to go around comparing penises with your kid when they're older (believe me, I have never compared vaginas with my daughter, not once), so it doesn't even matter. What DOES matter is that you won't be bringing pain upon this wonderful new little human that you had a part in creating. Can you imagine punching your baby in the face? No? I didn't so. So why the hell would you consider cutting off part of his penis? (I'm just saying.) Plus, circumcision WILL almost definitely interfere with breastfeeding and bonding. I have heard too many times where this was the case.
Well, I guess those are the main five. I'm sure there are many more, but you will learn them on the way, like we all have.