Another Chart!

I made another Facebook chart today: (You may remember my previous charts in posts entitled "Charts!" and "More Charts!")

Feel free to try this one for yourselves, and see if the age of your facebook friends equals out to your exact age. I may have stumbled upon an amazing formula.

Also... tomorrow there will be a Big Announcement! Big Announcement, people. Big Announcement!

Outside

Here are some pictures of my two youngest playing outside:

Thanksgiving 2012

We went to my mom's in Moorhead over the weekend to celebrate Thanksgiving.

This is my mom:

This is my sister, Andrea:

This is her husband, Jon:

Andrea and Jon remind me of sitcom characters Roseanne and Dan Connor, with their brashness and the way they lovingly joke and disparage each other. They're interactions are interesting to watch.

And this is Peace downing some water at the kiddie table:

We played this board game called "Say Anything" (not with the kids). Here is a sampling of some of our questions and answers. That we did. With my mother. (See below for the answers that were chosen.)

1) To Jon: What do you do to relax?

2) To me: What is your idea of a perfect date?

3) To Vernon: What is the worst thing you could put in your mouth?

4) To Vernon: What is the strangest thing to collect?

Also over the weekend, Vernon and I saw the movie Lincoln. It was pretty good. Kind of showy and Spielberg-ized, but overall pretty well done. (And the acting was incredible.)

My Toyota Corolla only got 30.6 mpg on the trip. What the heck? It was all highway driving too.

The End.



Answers:
1. Blow Jobs
2. Movie
3. Sperm
4. I don't remember

One More Thing...

Vermont was a Great Perhaps.

Hair Update

It has been three weeks since The Great Not-Washing-My-Hair Experiment, and I have washed my hair approximately three times since then. I just wash it with water and a little bit of vinegar, and one time I put an egg yolk in it.

That is all.

The Great Perhaps

I have gone to enough concerts in my lifetime to know that I don't really care to go to them.* Too loud. Too many people. Just not my thing. But my husband is really into live music, so I have gone with him.

And I'll go to these concerts and I'll observe people, and I'll wonder how they can be so uninhibited, so free, so full of life and love for the music. And even though my husband and I have similar temperaments (we're both quiet, introverted, and like to observe), even he would get into the music and the crowd and the movement behind the whole thing and start nodding his head, singing along, or whatever.

I admire those people at concerts. Doing what they do. Living life and not observing it.

I had a psychic tell me once that I am a supporting actor in the story of my life. That I am not the star.

So, I was thinking about this and thinking about this, and I suppose it might be true. Me... always observing my life and never really starring in it. I observe people as a photographer. I observe my kids growing up. And now, for this documentary I'm making, I'm going around filming this other person living her life and observing her.

Always observing life and examining it to the nth degree.

In this book I was reading (Looking for Alaska), the main character had been living an uneventful life and is trying to explain to his parents why he wants to go away to boarding school. He really likes reading about people's last words before they die. So he says to his parents, "This guy, Francois Rabelais. He was a poet. And his last words were 'I go to seek a Great Perhaps.' That's why I'm going. So I don't have to wait until I die to start seeking a Great Perhaps."

So, that got me to thinking about the Great Perhaps-es that I've missed out on in my life.

I remember going off to college and having a roommate that I was assigned to living with me in our dorm. She was very social, and requested another More-Social Roommate than myself. So I moved in with the More-Social Roommate's less-social roommate. My new roommate wrote letters to her boyfriend in California (they had some sort of inside joke about burritos), and she got mad at me for killing a bug once. We were unsocial and awkward together, ate with each other a couple of times in the cafeteria, went to see Spike Lee's movie "Clockers", and that was about it. Then, after that semester, I dropped out of college, moved back in with my parents, hung out with my grandma a lot, and went to a Technical College because I didn't want to spend all that money on school when "I didn't really know what I wanted to do with my life."

So, that was a Great Perhaps that was missed out on in favor of a more safe, less frightening perhaps.

I think that my not wanting to spend money has been a running theme in my life and maybe keeps me away from a lot of wonderful experiences and Great Perhaps-es.

Granted, right now we probably shouldn't be spending money anyway, considering we're crawling our way back up to where the poverty line separates... but even before, I didn't spend money like a normal person, and I missed out on a lot of wonderful experiences because of it. We didn't go ice skating at Rockefeller Center when we were in New York City because it was "too expensive" (even though it was something I had always really wanted to do). We could have stayed at a hotel that was nicer than the one that "is usually just used when people bring hookers here" - according to the hotel clerk - when we were in Dublin. And I've never played paintball or seen a Broadway play or ridden in a hot air balloon, even though I've been in situations to partake in them had I only spent the money.

I would like to experience life more. Live in the world. Connect with people. Engage in human consciousness instead of just observing it, you know?

I don't want to miss out on any Great Perhaps-es anymore because I'm afraid of that.



*Here is a list of the concerts that I have been to, because I know you are wondering and are secretly looking to judge me by my (or my husband's) musical taste, which I openly welcome you to do, and I will stand by any judgments you might make:

Firehouse - Minot, ND
Hootie and the Blowfish - Fargo, ND
Bush / Goo Goo Dolls / No Doubt - Fargo, ND
Shaded Red / Petra - Grand Forks, ND
Pearl Jam - Cardiff, Wales
Weezer - Chicago, IL
Rufus Wainwright - Chicago, IL
Rockford Mules - St Paul, MN
Jenny and Tyler - St Paul, MN

Roasted Pumpkin and Blue Cheese Lasagna

I got the original recipe here, and then doubled it. Please go to the original recipe to see better pictures of it, instead of looking at my somewhat lame attempt at a photograph. (Here's the problem I have with taking photographs of food: I have no patience to set up the shot because I want to eat it!)

So, here it is: Roasted Pumpkin and Blue Cheese Lasagna. Words that you have probably never heard together before, but know that they are so, so, right.

Ingredients:

1 pie pumpkin

2 T olive oil

1 red onion

2 cups ricotta

2 egg whites

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp pepper

4 T butter

4 T flour

2 cup milk

1 cup crumbled blue cheese

12 lasagna noodles

1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese 

Instructions:

Cut pumpkin into 1/2" pieces, shell removed. Toss with diced red onion. Cook at 375 degrees for 20-25 minutes.

Meanwhile... stir together ricotta, egg whites, salt, and pepper. Set aside. Boil lasagna noodles. And, in a small saucepan, heat butter over medium-low head. Once melted, whisk in flour and cook for one minute. Whisk in milk and continue to cook until sauce has thickened. Remove from heat and stir in blue cheese.

To assemble lasagna... pour 1/4 of the blue cheese sauce on the bottom of a 9x13 pan. Layer 4 lasagna noodles, followed by 1/2 of the ricotta mixture, 1/2 of the pumpkin mixture, and another 1/4 of the blue cheese sauce. Repeat. Then, for the final layer, add last 4 lasagna noodles, the remaining blue cheese sauce, and finish with the mozzarella cheese.

Bake at 375 for 40-45 minutes.

More on Catholicism...

At RCIA this week, "Mitch" told the group that 60% of Catholics who receive the Eucharist do not really believe that it is truly the body and blood of Jesus.

(Note: Through a process called transubstantiation in the Catholic church, the bread and wine IS actually transformed into Christ's body and blood, but it is stays looking like bread and wine so it doesn't creep us out. Other Christian churches just think of it as a symbol, but Catholics think it is the real thing. At least, they are supposed to.)

The thing is, this belief is what makes me love the Catholic church so much, and is the reason I don't feel drawn to other Christian churches. I want to eat me some Jesus!

(Note: There have been cases of Eucharistic Miracles, the Miracle of Lanciano for one in the 700's, in which the Eucharist has actually turned into Christ's flesh, literally. Scientists did studies on it in the 1970's and it was determined to be real flesh and real blood, and you can still look at it today.)

Shouldn't Catholics (or anyone, really) everywhere be amazed by this? These Churches are serving the Body of God! Shouldn't we all be a little more excited and in awe of it?

I know I should be. But, somehow, it becomes routine. And, thanks to my inherently flawed and selfish nature, I like getting the Eucharist most for the gifts it can bring to me (grace, forgiveness, love), instead of being in awe and amazed at the whole thing. It's kind of like when my mom comes to visit... I don't really care about connecting and being present with her. Instead, I'm thinking, "Free babysitter!" (Yes, I know, like I said, I am an inherently flawed and selfish human being. But this is the truth.)

So, when I hear that 60% of Catholics don't even believe in this great gift of the Eucharist that sets it, as a Church, apart from all the others, I'm thinking, "Well, what are they even doing here?" Just stay home. Or go to any other Church that has the other just-symbolic stuff that you do believe in.

But as for me, where else can I go to eat Jesus? Nowhere. This is it.

Thus, I am stuck with the Catholic Church. And, even though I might not agree with other facets of its teachings (specifically, the ideas behind sin and salvation), I have nowhere else to go. I need to eat Jesus.

I. just. do.

But how do I reconcile myself with not agreeing with the other parts of it, because the Catholic Church isn't a take-what-you-like-and-leave-the-rest kind of religion.

It. is. just. not.

So, I don't really know what to do about that.

Good day!

Home Videos

Here is a little video of my husband doing what he does in the chiropractic practice that he created 18 months ago:


And here's a video of Ocean and Ezra singing the state capitol song:


And here's a video of Peace singing the state capitol song:

And here's an old 18-second video of me interacting with Vern's family:

Can't We All Just Get Along?

Some words from a book by Morton Kelsey:

"We cannot love people until we realize the uniqueness of other people. Each of us is unique, and we have many different ways of acting and valuing. Until we realize that it is natural for others to be different from us, it is very difficult to love them, particularly those whose point of view seems almost opposite to our own."

I was thinking about these words while watching the onslaught of negative posts (from both sides) on facebook both before and after the election. Why are we, as individuals, so intent on being right all the time, instead of putting any effort into understanding one another?

I'm exploring the ideas of nothing being right or wrong. This probably isn't going to make much sense to anybody outside of my head (which, of course, is all of you)... but that's it. What if there IS no such thing as right or wrong? Or good or bad?

What are we learning from people when we label their thoughts / opinions / worldviews as wrong? What kind of connections are we making with each other then?

Don't get me wrong... I've done my fair share of judging and labeling (specifically, regarding how women choose to birth, treat their babies, etc.) in my life. But I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to judge other people. I don't want to label their choices as right or wrong / good or bad. I'm working on simply calling them "another person's choices" (or ideas, or values, or different ways of acting, or whatever).

And it is surprisingly easy to do that. And it makes me feel better and more connected to all of human consciousness because of it.

That is all.

Wild Horses

I went to the Minnesota Zoo this summer with my kids, and we saw some wild horses having sex. The male chased down one of the females and it basically looked, to our innocent eyes anyways, like he was mounting her and raping her. My kids and I just watched on in amazement, and then we talked about how that was NOT the way to have sex, as humans (the raping part of it anyway, not the doggy-style from behind part of it, because, from what I've heard, that is okay).

So, then we went to the Minnesota Zoo again a couple of days ago and we were approaching the wild horses and Ezra says, "Let's go see the baby horse." And it took me a second to realize what he was talking about. And then that vivid, VIVID memory came to play in my brain once again, and I said, "Ezra, horses don't have babies every time they have sex, you know. Same for people." To which he replied, "Oh."

Catholicism

So, I've been going to these RCIA classes through my church to learn more about my Catholic faith. It turns out, I know most of the stuff already... I'm just not sure if I agree with all of it or not. Or maybe it's just that I'm not understanding it completely.

Of course, it would help if I would actually ask my questions to these RCIA people, but, of course, I am too shy / nerdy / not-good-with-communicating / quiet (remember this post?) to do this.

There's this one leader there... let's call him "Mitch" (because that is his name, and since he is not going to read this blog so he will never know that I am using his real name)... who seems really smart and who I would really like to ask questions to. He has a background of being an atheist and then a Protestant and is now a Catholic. Somehow, I give a little more credit to people who choose the Catholic faith on their own (through independent study and research and the personal experience of grace), instead of being raised in it (like I have) and basically have their it chosen for them.

And it's not that I don't believe in (most of) what the Church has to say... it's just that I believe in EVERYTHING! I believe in Judaism, and Buddhism, and Santa Claus, and miracles, and the Kabbalah, and Deepak Chopra, and science, and birth, and psychics, and Lao Tzu, and ghosts, and Christian Science, and aliens, and chiropractic, and yoga, and even (certain) parts of Mormonism and Scientology.

And it's not that I'm gullible... it's just that I think that each of these things has some Truth to it. Like, I mean, what if all of these Truths are just parts of a greater whole? Or, what if different parts of the different aspects of Truth are different for different people (you know, like, different people, different journeys)? How can people (like me, who is questioning all of this), chose to be a part of just one?

Like, the Catholic Church only seems to recognize people (Saints) and miracles that occur only among Catholic people. But what about all of the other miracles that occur? Why are they any less important?

And if I am to call myself a Catholic, shouldn't I be more all-in with the whole thing? I don't know. And if I am not to be a Catholic, then what am I?

Election Day

I wrote in Ron Paul (which my husband told me was the equivalent to crumpling my ballot into a ball and throwing it out the window) and voted no and no.

Quiet, Quiet

I usually don't talk a lot, partly because I figure I can learn more by listening to what other people have to say since I already know everything I would have to say.

But I have been exploring the idea of talking more, because now I'm starting to think I could actually learn a bit more about myself my doing this. Maybe.

The problem is, I'm not very good at talking.

I tend to internalize experiences, and I tend to like it that way.

Take reading a book, for example. To me, reading a book is a nice little personal experience that I get to share with myself. And I like that.

But, there is this thing that I have decided to become a part of and this thing is called "Book Club". And the main point of Book Club is to discuss a book that we've all read... with each other.

Ah! I know, right? What a crazy thing for me to be a part of.

And I suck at it.

But, in an effort to grow as a human being and to explore the idea of talking more amongst other human beings, I am doing it.

I am not really talking more (because there are a lot of people in Book Club who have already mastered the art of talking and are therefore much better and more proficient at it than I will ever be), but I am there. Trying. Sort of. And that is something.

Not Washing My Hair - Day 16 - IT'S OVER!

Day 16. Just two days ago, I thought this could go on forever. And my hair still feels the same and I actually really like the way it feels, but yesterday, out of nowhere, the roots of my hair started aching a bit. I don't really know how else to describe it. An ache. Emanating from the roots. Especially achy when the hair at the roots is rubbed or moved.

So, this will be my last photo. I'm hopping in the shower immediately after I post this.

(Also, other than tank tops, this is basically the last shirt I own that has yet to be photographed.)

Not Washing My Hair - Day 15

Day 15:

And this is what my girls look like, who haven't washed their hair with shampoo or baking soda in who knows how long: